


So it is

by Threadbear



Series: So it is [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Canon Divergence - Post-Hogwarts, Cheating, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Hogwarts, Post-War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:42:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24033724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Threadbear/pseuds/Threadbear
Summary: Harry Potter was getting married tomorrow. He was thrilled.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Severus Snape
Series: So it is [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1759291
Comments: 16
Kudos: 147





	So it is

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from The Blower's Daughter by Damien Rice. Seemed appropriate.

Harry was getting married tomorrow. He was thrilled. It was everything he had always wanted. It was really, really good.

And yet, temporarily foregoing the six million things he should currently be doing, he was instead standing on Snape’s doorstep.

He should really call him Severus but he had never gotten around to changing the habit. Secretly he didn’t like how it sounded on his lips, too personal, too revealing, like a big red flag. Snape still called him Potter and he didn’t discourage it.

“What is it Potter?” He said, like always, that was always how he greeted him, every time. Like he is put out by Harry’s mere existence. And Harry knows he is. Knows the very act of him living was probably some kind of payment for Snape’s myriad sins. He imagined that was how Snape thought of him.

Harry pushed past him and made his way to the kitchen. He imagined Snape rolling his eyes at his back. _Were you never taught any manners Potter?_

“You know those of us who are not the famous Harry Potter prefer to wait for an invitation.”

Harry jumped up and sat on the bench, grabbed an apple and took a bite, grinned.

Snape flicked the kettle on. “I assume you’re not just here to eat all my food?”

He took another bite of the apple and placed it back down on the counter top. “Ginny wants to know if you’re coming tomorrow.”

“Hmm?” Snape said absently, he held up a cup questioningly. Harry nodded.

“Snape. Tomorrow. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten.”

“Remind me.” He was busying himself with the tea and wasn’t looking at him.

“It’s tomorrow Snape. I’m getting married tomorrow, as you well know. You still haven’t given us an answer. Ginny needs to know for numbers.”

He waited as Snape poured the water and topped the cups up with milk. Extra milk for Harry. He noticed that. Harry always noticed the little things. Though he pretended not to. He pretended not to like he was paid to.

Harry sipped as his milky tea.

“It’s better if I don’t.”

He tried not to feel like his throat was closing up. “Why the fuck not.” His voice came out hard and quiet, it didn’t sound like him at all.

“Watch how you talk to me Potter.” Snape said but Harry could tell his heart wasn’t in it.

“Why not.”

Snape’s eyes pierced and pinned him to the spot for a moment, he couldn’t look away, though he wanted to. Wanted to run out of his shitty, crumbling old house and never look back. Though deep down Harry trusted him to say the right thing. To keep to the script.

Snape took a sharp inward breath and looked away. “Because we hate each other Potter. You and your little entourage will have a much better time without me around to ruin it.”

“Even so.” Harry said, he looked up at him through his lashes and gave him a small, quick smile. Thank you, he thought.

“Potter for the love of God,” Snape whispered sharply, “I will pay you not to look at me like that.”

He gulped and looked away contritely. Right, he knew better.

“I still want you there.” He said. “None of that stuff matters.” _We_ , he thought. _We_ was what he had practiced. _We_ want you there.

“I’m the last person you need there. I’m doing you a favour.”

“I’m asking you to.”

“No Potter, forget it, enjoy your day.”

“Fuck, Snape _please—“_

Snape slammed his mug down on the counter, tea sloshed over the sides. “ _Harry._ ” He whispered furiously. “ _Don’t ask this of me_.”

“ _I need you there Severus_.” Neither of them were able to have this conversation above a whisper.

“ _No you don’t_.”

“ _You think this isn’t hard for me too?_ ”

“ _How? How is this hard for you?_ ”

Of course he couldn’t answer that. He didn’t even try.

“Hermione will be disappointed of course.” He said finally in a normal, bland voice. “She was looking forward to you being there.”

Snape visibly eased. “You will have to pass on my apologies. And to Ms. Weasley too.”

“Yes.”

“I dare say she’ll be needing you back.”

“She doesn’t know I’m here.” Harry wasn’t sure just why he admitted that. Snape gave a gesture of a smile, just a small crook of acknowledgement.

“Your wife will be looking for you then Potter.”

“She’s not my wife yet.” He didn’t look at him as he said it. Brash. Reckless. Stupid boy. What are you doing? Remember the script.

Snape studied him for a beat longer than was comfortable, Harry could feel his cheeks going warm under the force of his gaze.

“It’s taking everything in me to try and forget that right now.” He said finally in a low voice.

“ _And if you couldn’t forget?_ ” Harry said, whispering again. “ _What would you do? What would you do to me if it was your very very last chance?_ “

Snape’s eyes flashed like fire. “ _Everything_. Stupid stupid boy.”

Harry met his eyes, his heart thrumming in his chest. He nodded, just once.

Snape’s lips on him were shocking but Harry’s lips behaved as if they had planned it. He kissed him back like he’d been waiting for him to do that all his life. Severus kissed like he was taking his soul from him, his hands pinning his head firmly in place. Though Harry had never seen him do anything with any less intensity. He pulled away just as suddenly as he had started.

“Tell me to stop Harry.” He pleaded, his eyes wild. “Harry. Tell me to stop.”

Snape vibrated between his legs as Harry sat on the counter top. He tried to but he couldn’t. He didn’t possess the strength.

This time when they kissed their bodies were flush against one another and oh god Snape’s cock. Snape wanting him, Snape needing him. His strong fingers framing his head, Harry’s arms round his neck and his legs holding on.

Snape pulled back and looked at him with a question in his eyes. Do it, Harry said, do it, do it, do it.

Be quick.

Snape pulled him by his legs and suddenly Harry was standing on the ground being manhandled until he was facing forward against the kitchen bench and they each unzipped and pushed their trousers down with quick, perfunctory motions. A spell was cast and Harry wasn’t expecting the slick intrusion, it felt cold and unpleasant. He was glad it did. He didn’t want to enjoy it.

Then the blunt head of Snape’s prick seeking entrance. _Please_ , Harry said as his fingers scrabbled for purchase on the counter edge.

He was stretched full though it hurt less than he thought it would. Snape pulled him close to his chest and took him, took him, took him. This was what it was like to be fucked by Severus Snape. And not that Harry had thought of it but he was just like he had imagined, hard, dominating, relentless. Not that he had imagined.

He will probably come. If Snape kept doing that he would. He hadn’t wanted to. He had wanted Snape to take what he needed from him and leave him. He had wanted that for him. For him to use him like that. It was too much though. And he’s young and it’s sex and _god_ he’d wanted this. He’d ached for this. _Severus_ , he said, _Severus, Severus, Severus_.

 _Harry, Harry, God, Harry._ His name on his lips felt like a caress. He had known first names were not for them.

“You’ll come tomorrow.” Harry said, breathless.

“Yes.”

“Because I’ve asked you to. Because I need you there.”

“Yes. I hate you Harry. I fucking hate you.”

“You don’t though.” Harry said though even now he’s not completely sure.

“How’s that?” Snape asked him on a long inward stroke that hit something so good inside him that Harry collapsed to the counter. His glasses were pushed askew and the vinyl was cool against his cheek.

“Uh huh.” He whined.

“That it?”

“Uh, yeah. Uh.” Harry hadn’t known he made sounds like that, he kept making them because it was all he could do.

“I’m going to make you come Harry.”

“Yes you are. You’re doing it.”

Severus made gruff grunting sounds behind him, and Harry hadn’t imagined this, Snape caring, Snape sounding just a little unsure, Snape losing control. “Do you want me to come inside you?” he asked.

“Yes god yes.” It’s all he wanted. It’s all he thought about. Oh fuck.

“God I do too.”

“Yes, fucking fill me with it.”

“Harry, perfect. You’re fucking perfect.”

Then he was splattering the cupboard doors with thick ropes of his come as he felt Severus bury himself deep inside him with a loud exhale of breath. Harry’s shaking legs collapsed beneath him and then he was being held up by strong arms and oh God, he wished for once he would just let him fall. He could get on with forgetting then. Get on with his life, stop this childish obsession with a man he could never have. (Mutual mutual mutual. Mutual obsession.) (Doesn’t matter.)

This was one hell of a come down.

“Ah.” Harry said finding his feet. “Um.”

“Yeah.” Snape said and pulled out of him. “Should I? A Spell?” His tender awkwardness made Harry’s heart clench.

“Yes.” He said quickly and the wetness between his legs was gone. (Maybe he should have said no.) (Of course not that would be madness.)

They arranged their clothes in silence. He wanted to say something to let him know it was alright. What they did was alright. But it was all it ever would be. Was there a way of saying that?

“Go now Potter.” Snape said but his face is soft, his usual sneering contempt for him gone momentarily and his eyes filled with a thousand things unsaid.

Ah that was it. Only Snape could say it just right without saying anything at all.

So he left, with a practiced light step, easy, as if every step didn’t feel like he was stepping on knives. He imagined Snape grabbing his arm as he passed, twirling him around, kissing him soundly, whispering _please stay._ But that wasn’t for them. That was for movies, that was for uncomplicated, that was for he and Ginny. For friendly, easy conversation, for laughter, for friendship, for marriage and their future children they had already named.

Not for a man who spoke in small, unacknowledgedacts, who would look at you like he could eat you alive but wouldn’t say your name, who made I hate you sound like I love you.

It was good that it went this way. How silly of him to have imagined any different.

“See you tomorrow Snape.” He said.


End file.
